June 15, 2010

When It Came To Adolescence..

Feeling of Heaven is defined as love or Love is defined as feeling of Heaven ? No one,who exists knows the correct definition of it. They say Adolescence is a period when we fall in love but that love isn't love, it's just attraction. What does it really mean? Don't the Adolescents have feelings? Aren't they big enough to know what exactly is it? I've gone through the similar period and I'm a teenager yet.

He shifted in my building only half a year after I did. Gradually, friendship. Close friendship. And after that, the thing which most of the teenagers experience nowadays, “Love”. Innocent love. But was true enough to prove it right. We enjoyed together. As friends and as lovers. A year after he thought about an ‘awesome idea’(according to him) about going to a boarding school. The things were bound to change after that but we decided to stay in the same way but it was difficult, for me at least. That year, I cried for him. Craved to meet him every passing day.. But it wasn’t really possible. And after that, the worst thing which has ever happened in my life, I shifted to another city. Full of strangers but I had no excitement about it as I’m a Xenophobian. Our Lives became more complicated. We had to struggle, at least I had to. When I was about to cross my first Milestone, I broke up with him. It had no reason according to him, but I was frustrated by living such a life. But, I couldn’t live without it and patched it up after some days. To my bad, he wasn’t ready for it. And he broke up again. May be he wanted to take a revenge. But why did he say that he was pretending his love since so many years?! I cried that night but I never felt lonely as my cutest pals were there for me to console.. It had come to an end. I never thought that I’d ever commit a relationship again..

But, I did..The very next day. Yeah, I know it was a stupidity but I don’t know what lead me to get a nod on his proposal. He loved me from his heart and he still does, yes still! But the problem here was, I didn’t love him. I broke up again by saying that I am not comfortable with it.
Next day after my second break off, I committed a relation again. The person who’ll read this may think that I’m a jerk. And I am. There’s nothing incorrect. Talking about my third relation, he was my good friend till then but we decided to break up on the second day itself. He wasn’t serious, I knew that and even I was ‘just’ attracted.. For months, I enjoyed being single. But, a person who can never erase his presence from my heart,my friend, my companion, I fell for him. Was deeply in love with him. Didn’t confess till he made me to do it. And, lucky me! Even he felt the same for me. Yes, he did. I was the happiest person on this Earth and after 7 months 14 days, still I am the happiest. And I wish, I’ll remain always.. He makes me FEEL love. When he’s with me, the world seems cheerful. Cheering for me. But when he isn’t, the world seems empty.. I miss him every passing day.. He stays far away.. He belongs to me.. I love him.. I miss him..:)

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